‘MANY GOODIES  FOR YOUR FRIENDSHIPOLGY’– ABBOT-ANDOVER CLASSMATE’ ANNE GATES WISHED BILLY – May 2024 – GOODIES ARRIVED THE FOLLOWING WEEK : Paul Sander’s List of 23 Social Skills and Jim Luce’s Organic Recipe For Life.

Immediately after Anne Gate’s Good Wishes, Billy  discovered a list 23 Random Social Skills from Paul Sanders who was promoting his book “ Get The Friends You Want”:

  1. Shaking off the feelings of loneliness or social hesitation,
  2. Discovering or remembering your value & what you can bring to the table (Why people should hang out with you),
  3. Knowing where to go to meet new people,
  4. Reaching out to acquaintances to hang out (even though you haven’t spoken for a while),
  5. Starting conversations and getting a basic exchange going,
  6. Keeping conversations going,
  7. Making random conversations interesting & fun,
  8. Beyond just talking – connecting (or vibing) with another person,
  9. Handling a group conversation,
  10. Finding things in common,
  11. Using basic humor, alleviating tension, giving off a relaxed vibe,
  12. Finding opportunities for why you should stay in touch & hang out in the future,
  13. Exchanging contact information,
  14. Following up, making plans, having people say “Yes!” and show up to your plans,
  15. Having a great time with people you meet for the first few times,
  16. Making friendship “happen” & starting to build trust,
  17. Introducing people to each other,
  18. Establishing a social habit with others to solidify the friendship,
  19. Turning casual friends into close friends,
  20. Building social circles,
  21. Turning a casual social circle into a circle of care and support (a group of close friends who have each others’ back),
  22. Building a professional network that supports your career or business,
  23. And, Handling the occasional conflict between friends and keeping the drama away.

Simultaneously, a short inspiring poem written especially for me by my very dear friend, James Luce, arrived. James normally writes long deep critical analysis, but he did this special favor for me as he knew that I could only absorb so much at a time.

AN ORGANIC RECIPE FOR LIFE

              Jaume Luz

                Chef de Cuisine

Fold gently four ingredients into each day.

Reflect on what each ingredient has to say.

Insulate from fear or you’ll burn the crust.

Empathy, Compassion, Joy, and Trust

Need patience to mature and fuse.

Don’t shake, rattle, or abuse.

Sprinkling some sugar into the bowl

Helps to reach your intended goal.

Inhale the aroma of those ingredients blended,

Perpetually the results are splendid.

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WORDS FOR VARIOUS AGE GROUPS TO INDUCE APPRECIATION FOR FRIENDSHIP – MAY 2024 –     FIVE: Words For Senior Retirees.

WORDS FOR SENIOR RETIREES TO BRING JOY TO EACHOTHER ABOUT THE VALUE OF FRIENDSHIP IN LIFE AND HOW TO HELP THE YOUNGER FRIENDS AND FAMILYMEMBERS ON HOW TO CULTIVATE FRIENDSHIP AND JOY IN LIFE?

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Here are some words senior retirees could share to bring joy and insight about the value of friendship and how to cultivate it:

  1. Wisdom of Experience: “Throughout my life, I’ve learned that one of the greatest treasures we can have is friendship. It’s not just about having someone to share our joys with, but also to support us through the challenges life throws our way.”
  2. Nurturing Relationships: “As we grow older, we realize the importance of nurturing our relationships. It’s not about the quantity of friends we have, but the quality of the connections we foster.”
  3. Acts of Kindness: “Sometimes, the smallest acts of kindness can have the biggest impact on someone’s life. Whether it’s a phone call, a handwritten letter, or a simple gesture of support, reaching out to others can bring immense joy to both parties.”
  4. Listening and Understanding: “In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to forget the importance of truly listening to one another. Being a good friend means offering a listening ear, understanding without judgment, and being there through thick and thin.”
  5. Sharing Life’s Joys and Sorrows: “Life is full of ups and downs, but having friends to share these experiences with makes the journey worthwhile. Whether it’s celebrating achievements or offering a shoulder to lean on during tough times, friends make life richer and more meaningful.”
  6. Embracing Differences: “One of the beauties of friendship is the diversity it brings. We all come from different backgrounds and have unique perspectives, but it’s these differences that enrich our lives and broaden our horizons.”
  7. Leading by Example: “As senior retirees, we have the opportunity to lead by example and show the younger generation the importance of cultivating meaningful relationships. By demonstrating kindness, empathy, and generosity, we can inspire others to do the same.”
  8. Creating Memories: “Some of the fondest memories we have are those shared with friends. Whether it’s traveling to new places, trying new experiences, or simply enjoying each other’s company, these moments create bonds that last a lifetime.”
  9. Staying Connected: “In today’s digital age, staying connected has never been easier. Whether it’s through social media, video calls, or good old-fashioned visits, it’s important to make an effort to stay in touch with friends and family members near and far.”
  10. Gratitude and Appreciation: “Above all, let’s never forget to express gratitude for the friends we have in our lives. Each friendship is a gift, and it’s important to cherish and appreciate those who bring joy, laughter, and love into our lives.”

These sentiments can serve as a guide for senior retirees to impart wisdom and encouragement to younger friends and family members on the value of friendship and how to cultivate it for a more joyful life.

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WHAT ARE SOME OF THE NO NOs THE SENIORs SHOULD REMIND THE YOUNGER GENERATIONS – FOR EXAMPLE ARROGANCE ETC ETC. PLEASE SITE EXAMPLES IN REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE.

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Here are some “no-no’s” that seniors may want to remind younger generations about, along with real-life examples:

  1. Arrogance and Entitlement: Younger generations may sometimes exhibit arrogance or entitlement, believing they deserve special treatment or privileges without putting in the necessary effort. Seniors can remind them that humility and hard work are essential for personal growth and success. For instance, sharing stories of their own humble beginnings and the journey they took to achieve their goals can provide valuable perspective.
  2. Lack of Respect for Elders: In today’s fast-paced world, some younger individuals may forget to show proper respect for their elders. Seniors can emphasize the importance of respecting elders for their wisdom, experience, and contributions to society. They might share personal anecdotes of how showing respect to elders has enriched their lives and taught them valuable lessons.
  3. Overdependence on Technology: While technology has its benefits, seniors may caution younger generations against becoming overly dependent on it. They can share instances where excessive screen time or reliance on gadgets has led to a disconnect Younger generations may struggle with patience and seek instant gratification in various aspects of life, such as career advancement or relationships. Seniors can emphasize the value of perseverance, resilience, and delayed gratification. Sharing personal stories of overcoming obstacles or achieving long-term goals through patience and perseverance can serve as inspiring examples.
  4. Neglecting Mental Health: In today’s busy world, mental health issues such as stress, anxiety, and depression are prevalent among younger generations. Seniors can encourage them to prioritize self-care and seek support when needed. Sharing personal experiences of coping with life’s challenges and the importance of seeking professional help when facing mental health issues can help destigmatize seeking assistance.
  5. Disregard for Tradition and Culture: With globalization and modernization, younger generations may sometimes disregard traditional values and cultural practices. Seniors can remind them of the importance of preserving and respecting their cultural heritage. Sharing stories of how cultural traditions have shaped their identities and enriched their lives can foster a sense of pride and appreciation for their heritage.
  6. Materialism and Consumerism: In a consumer-driven society, younger generations may prioritize material possessions and external validation over inner fulfillment and personal growth. Seniors can caution against the pitfalls of materialism and encourage them to focus on experiences, relationships, and meaningful pursuits. Sharing stories of finding joy and contentment in simple pleasures and experiences rather than material wealth can inspire a shift in perspective.

By sharing these “no-no’s” along with real-life examples and personal anecdotes, seniors can impart valuable wisdom and guidance to younger generations, helping them navigate life with greater awareness, humility, and respect.

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WORDS FOR VARIOUS AGE GROUPS TO INDUCE APPRECIATION FOR FRIENDSHIP- MAY 2024 –    FOUR: Words For Mature Adults

WORDS FOR MATURE ADULTS TO INDUCE APPRECIATION OF FRIENDSHIP AND LEARN WAYS TO TEACH THEIR YOUNGER FRIENDS

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Here are some words and phrases that mature adults might use to induce appreciation of friendship and teach their younger friends:

  1. Gratitude: Encouraging young friends to express gratitude for the friendships they have can deepen their appreciation.
  2. Empathy: Teaching younger friends to understand and share the feelings of others can strengthen their bonds with their friends.
  3. Reciprocity: Helping them understand the importance of giving back to their friends and being there for them in times of need.
  4. Communication: Emphasizing the value of open and honest communication in maintaining strong friendships.
  5. Trust: Discussing the significance of trust in friendships and how it’s built over time through consistency and reliability.
  6. Forgiveness: Explaining the power of forgiveness in resolving conflicts and maintaining long-lasting friendships.
  7. Support: Encouraging them to be supportive of their friends’ goals, dreams, and challenges.
  8. Quality time: Stressing the importance of spending quality time together and creating memorable experiences.
  9. Boundaries: Teaching them about setting healthy boundaries in friendships to maintain mutual respect and understanding.
  10. Appreciation: Helping them recognize and appreciate the unique qualities and strengths of each friend.
  11. Kindness: Promoting acts of kindness and generosity as essential elements of friendship.
  12. Loyalty: Discussing the importance of loyalty and standing by your friends through thick and thin.
  13. Vulnerability: Encouraging them to be vulnerable with their friends and share their true thoughts and feelings.
  14. Adaptability: Teaching them to adapt to changes in friendships and navigate challenges with resilience.
  15. Reflection: Encouraging them to reflect on the value that each friendship brings to their lives and express their appreciation regularly.

By using these words and concepts, mature adults can help instill a deeper appreciation of friendship in their younger counterparts and guide them in building meaningful and lasting connections.

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Please site detail examples on how it is done in each case.

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Certainly! Here are detailed examples of how mature adults can use each concept to induce appreciation of friendship and teach their younger friends:

  1. Gratitude: Encouraging young friends to express gratitude by setting an example. For instance, they could start a tradition of sharing what they’re grateful for at the beginning or end of each hangout session, highlighting the role each friend plays in their lives.
  2. Empathy: Demonstrating empathy by actively listening to their young friends’ concerns and validating their feelings. They could share personal experiences where empathy strengthened their friendships, showing how understanding and empathizing with others can deepen connections.
  3. Reciprocity: Teaching younger friends about reciprocity by emphasizing the importance of giving back in friendships. They could encourage them to plan thoughtful gestures or surprises for their friends, demonstrating how small acts of kindness can strengthen bonds.
  4. Communication: Emphasizing the value of open communication by initiating honest conversations about feelings, boundaries, and expectations within friendships. They could role-play different scenarios to practice effective communication skills and resolve conflicts constructively.
  5. Trust: Discussing the significance of trust in friendships by sharing stories of trust-building experiences and how trust forms the foundation of strong relationships. They could also encourage their young friends to honor commitments and maintain confidentiality to foster trust.
  6. Forgiveness: Teaching the power of forgiveness by discussing instances where forgiving a friend strengthened their bond. They could emphasize that forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting but rather letting go of resentment to move forward in the friendship.
  7. Support: Encouraging their young friends to be supportive by actively listening, offering encouragement, and providing help when needed. They could model supportive behavior by being there for their friends during challenging times and celebrating their successes.
  8. Quality time: Stressing the importance of spending quality time together by planning meaningful activities that foster connection and create lasting memories. They could suggest unplugging from technology during hangouts to focus on each other and deepen their bond.
  9. Boundaries: Teaching the importance of setting healthy boundaries in friendships by discussing personal boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others. They could role-play boundary-setting scenarios and reinforce the idea that boundaries promote mutual respect and understanding.
  10. Appreciation: Helping younger friends recognize and appreciate the unique qualities of each friend by highlighting their strengths and contributions to the group dynamic. They could initiate a gratitude exercise where everyone takes turns expressing appreciation for each other.
  11. Kindness: Promoting acts of kindness by encouraging their young friends to perform random acts of kindness for each other and for others outside the friendship circle. They could discuss the ripple effect of kindness and how it enhances the overall well-being of everyone involved.
  12. Loyalty: Discussing the importance of loyalty in friendships by emphasizing the value of standing by your friends through both good times and bad. They could share personal stories of loyalty and discuss how loyalty strengthens trust and mutual support.
  13. Vulnerability: Encouraging vulnerability by creating a safe space where young friends feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, feelings, and insecurities without fear of judgment. They could lead by example by sharing their own vulnerabilities and demonstrating that vulnerability deepens connection.
  14. Adaptability: Teaching adaptability by discussing how friendships evolve over time and how flexibility and resilience are key to navigating changes. They could encourage their young friends to embrace change and find creative ways to stay connected even during challenging circumstances.
  15. Reflection: Encouraging reflection by prompting their young friends to think about the value that each friendship brings to their lives and express their appreciation regularly. They could suggest journaling about their friendships or discussing what they’ve learned from their friends during group reflections.

By incorporating these detailed examples into their interactions with younger friends, mature adults can effectively convey the importance of friendship and teach valuable lessons on how to nurture and appreciate these relationships.

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WORDS FOR VARIOUS AGE GROUPS TO INDUCE APPRECIATION FOR FRIENDSHIP- MAY 2024 – THREE: Words For Young Adults

Words and actions to induce appreciation of Friendship for young adults pursuing career development to create long-term feelings and attitudes. Words of memories that “stick”.

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When fostering appreciation for friendship among young adults pursuing career development, it’s important to weave words and actions that resonate deeply and create lasting impressions. Here are some approaches:

  1. Shared Experiences: Encourage shared experiences that create lasting memories. Whether it’s celebrating achievements together, overcoming challenges, or simply spending quality time, these shared moments form the bedrock of strong friendships. Mention specific instances that highlight the bond you share.
  2. Supportive Language: Use words that convey support and encouragement. Express gratitude for their presence in your life and acknowledge the value they bring. Highlight moments when their support made a significant impact on your journey.
  3. Authenticity: Be genuine in your expressions of appreciation. Share your feelings openly and honestly. Authenticity builds trust and deepens connections. Recall moments when you felt the authenticity of their friendship, perhaps during vulnerable times or heartfelt conversations.
  4. Recognition: Recognize their unique qualities and contributions to your life. Point out the strengths they bring to your friendship and how they enhance your experiences. Reminisce about times when their particular talents or personality traits shone through.
  5. Thoughtfulness: Be thoughtful in your words and actions. Small gestures of kindness and thoughtfulness go a long way in strengthening friendships. Reflect on instances when they went out of their way to show they care, whether through a thoughtful gesture, a kind word, or simply being there when you needed them most.
  6. Shared Goals: Emphasize the importance of shared goals and aspirations. Discuss your career ambitions and how you can support each other in achieving them. Recall conversations where you both envisioned your futures together and how your friendship plays a pivotal role in realizing those dreams.
  7. Gratitude: Express gratitude for their friendship and the impact they’ve had on your life. Acknowledge the joy and fulfillment they bring, and express how grateful you are to have them by your side. Share specific memories that illustrate the depth of your appreciation.

By incorporating these elements into your words and actions, you can foster a deep appreciation for friendship among young adults pursuing career development, creating long-term feelings and attitudes that endure through the ups and downs of life.

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What words they use among themselves that shows appreciation and define their relationships?

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Young adults often use a variety of words and phrases to express appreciation for their friends and to define their relationships. Here are some examples:

  1. Bro/Brother/Sis/Sister: Terms of endearment that signify a close bond, akin to familial relationships. “Thanks, bro, for always having my back.”
  2. Bestie/Best Friend: Referring to someone as their “bestie” or “best friend” indicates a deep level of trust and intimacy. “You’re my rock, my best friend.”
  3. Squad: Used to describe a close-knit group of friends who support each other through thick and thin. “Couldn’t have done it without my squad cheering me on.”
  4. Ride or Die: Signifying unwavering loyalty and support, often used to describe friends who will stick by each other through anything. “You’re my ride or die, always there when I need you.”
  5. Homie: A casual term of affection used among friends, indicating camaraderie and closeness. “You’re my homie, man. Thanks for being there.”
  6. Partner in Crime: Describes a friend with whom one shares adventures and mischievous moments. “You’re my partner in crime, always up for an adventure.”
  7. BFFL (Best Friends for Life): Emphasizes the enduring nature of their friendship, regardless of life’s changes and challenges. “We’re BFFLs, no matter where life takes us.”
  8. Day One: Refers to a friend who has been there from the beginning, through thick and thin. “You’re my day one, always there since the start.”
  9. Rock: Describes a friend who provides stability and support during tough times. “You’re my rock, always there to lean on.”
  10. Soulmate: Not just reserved for romantic relationships, friends may refer to each other as soulmates to signify a deep spiritual connection and understanding. “You’re my soulmate, we just get each other.”

These words and phrases not only express appreciation but also define the depth and significance of the friendships among young adults pursuing career development. They reflect the unique bonds formed through shared experiences, support, and understanding.

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FEELING OF FRIENDSHIP ?

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The feeling of friendship is a profound sense of connection, understanding, and warmth that arises when individuals share a deep bond. It’s a feeling of being accepted and valued for who you are, flaws and all. Here’s a deeper exploration of the feelings associated with friendship:

  1. Acceptance: Friendship evokes a sense of acceptance, where individuals feel comfortable being their authentic selves without fear of judgment. It’s a space where imperfections are embraced, and differences are celebrated.
  2. Trust: Trust is a cornerstone of friendship, fostering a feeling of security and reliability. Friends confide in each other, knowing that their secrets and vulnerabilities are safe. There’s a sense of reassurance in knowing that someone has your back no matter what.
  3. Joy: Friendship brings joy and laughter into one’s life. Shared experiences, inside jokes, and moments of pure happiness create memories that last a lifetime. The feeling of joy is amplified when it’s shared with friends who genuinely care about your well-being.
  4. Support: Friends provide support during both the good times and the bad. Whether it’s offering a listening ear, providing words of encouragement, or lending a helping hand, the feeling of support from friends is invaluable. Knowing that you have someone to lean on in times of need brings comfort and strength.
  5. Empathy: Friendship cultivates empathy, the ability to understand and share in the feelings of others. Friends empathize with each other’s struggles and celebrate each other’s successes. The feeling of being understood and supported on an emotional level deepens the bond between friends.
  6. Gratitude: Friendship elicits feelings of gratitude for the people who enrich our lives in meaningful ways. There’s a profound appreciation for the laughter, the tears, the shared experiences, and the unwavering support that friends provide. Gratitude fosters a sense of connection and reciprocity in friendships.
  7. Belonging: Friendship creates a sense of belonging and community. It’s a feeling of being part of something greater than oneself, a network of caring individuals who uplift and empower each other. The feeling of belonging strengthens bonds and fosters a sense of unity among friends.
  8. Comfort: Friendship offers comfort in times of distress and solace in moments of solitude. Knowing that there are people who care about you unconditionally provides a sense of comfort and peace. Friends offer a safe haven where you can be yourself without fear of rejection.

Overall, the feeling of friendship is a beautiful tapestry woven from acceptance, trust, joy, support, empathy, gratitude, belonging, and comfort. It’s a bond that enriches our lives and brings meaning to our experiences, reminding us that we are never alone on life’s journey.

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